Imagine

 

 

Imagine we are sitting in front of a fireplace. I pour the coffee, would you rather have tea, or a mulled wine? The fire is quietly burning, snapping occasionally, I guess those logs had a bit of water in them.

We settle down with our drinks, prop our feet up, and I explain that I have aired complaints on my blog for the last couple of years; now it's your turn.

So, tell me, is anything bothering you?

I used to have a close friend who would visit for a few days, and we would sit up at night talking. First, we had to get all the frustrations, irritations, and junk, out of our heads, and then about 3 in the morning we would get down to serious, insightful conversation.

It was like a writer's morning pages—write the junk out so the good stuff can come in

Steven Pressfield advises artists to "Sweep your floor, so the Muse doesn't soil her gown on the way in."

But here we are, you and me. 

If you don't want to tell me what's bothering you, that's okay. Write it down; I won't peek. Get personal, not just about world conditions.

(Ah, I have to tell you, a Robin just perched on a limb outside my window, and it's November 24, 2025. I thought winter was coming, and that robins are spring birds. He sat a minute, looked at me, and then flew on. Good luck on your journey, sweet bird.)

Having an interruption like that rather knocks those bothersome thoughts out of one's head, doesn't it? 

It did mine.

Lately, I've been reading and writing about "Get Happy." And I know the idea of "Let's just get happy" irks some people. I have a friend who says she is happy all the time, and she gets flak for it.

But I am investigating the possibility of "Let's Get Happy Now" using Joseph McClendon III's definition of happiness.:

"Happiness is a mental and emotional state of being where your internal focus is optimistic, and the body produces positive energy."

Now that's something I can get behind. It doesn't say, "Just decide to be happy."

It doesn't minimize hard times.

It doesn't say that we will live in eternal joy.

It doesn't say that being grateful will bring about happiness, although being thankful for the good in your life is a splendid idea. 

It doesn't say that your emotions of sadness, depression, grief, or anger ought not to be expressed; it says that "your internal focus is optimistic, and the body produces positive energy."

"Happiness," some say, "comes and goes." It's fun to be happy. But we aren't "ha ha" happy all the time. We laugh at a joke and it fills the happy coffer for a minute. We see a beautiful sunset, an ocean, a beach, or an exquisite alpine forest, and we are in awe. That's fun. We giggle with our children when we see them running in joyful enthusiasm. We love being in love—talk about endorphins. There are many avenues to happiness. But we don't live on the mountain top all the time; that might wear out our synapses, too. However, the idea of living in an optimistic, positive state sounds good to me.

I think when people say, "I just want to be happy," it means more like McClendon has described—being optimistic and allowing our body to produce positive energy.

Those individuals who have lived to be 100 or older, especially those who live in the "blue zones" of the world, probably have experienced sadness, grief, disappointment, anger, and resentment, but that is not where they live.

Generally, those centurions have a full life: they eat well, have social contact, a spiritual bent, and, as they mostly live in a village, they walk a lot.

Most of us don't live in villages anymore; we live in cities or on the farm or in residential areas where often neighbors never speak to each other. However, we can make an effort to create a healthier lifestyle. Joseph McClendon III, a neuropsychologist, says that when people come into his office and he asks them what they want, they usually have a grocery list of things they do not want. When he presses them by asking what they want, they go blank.

Here is an exercise McClendon suggests: Write down your most magnificent day as you see it in your mind's eye.

Or in our case, sitting here in front of the fireplace, we could share how we see our Magnificent Day with each other.

I would love to hear your take on this.

This has been a lovely visit, more on happiness later.

Thank you for joining me.

                        

P.S. I wrote this post for the newsletter I am trying to get going, but decided to also post it here so you will see what I am up to.

josnewsletter.com

Stop Fixing Yourself, Wake Up, All is Well

 

"With the simple act of reaching out our hand to the Universe, we become partners with life." --Julia Cameron

 

Ah yes. As my years have become more, I see that time is our most cherished possession—if you can possess time, which you can't. It goes its merry way, and either we relish in it or fritter it away.

 

No more frittering.

 

However, that does not mean that we don't cloud gaze or watch the sunset- we had the most amazing one last night. It was like a tequila sunrise (sunset), layered, starting with a brilliant fuchsia and ending in gold. We wool-gather, we take in forest walks, sometimes called "Forest Bathing." I've read that three days in the forest will clear the pipes for a week. And river rifting? A week on the river can be life-changing. One soldier who had shrapnel in his head and would only say, "F-you," would, by the end of a week kayaking, speak complete sentences. And they were clean ones. 

 

I just dipped into Julia Cameron's latest book—you may remember her book out ten years ago, The Artist Way, where she introduced the idea of "Morning Pages." Writing Morning Pages allows you to write out the crap so the good stuff can come through. Morning Pages are where you can whine and complain, and no one can hear you. Only the page listens. 

 

Cameron also introduced the idea of the Artist's Date—where once a week, you take yourself to a place that inspires you. Your date could be a fabric store or a museum. Oh, I remember, as a kid, I had two favorite stores in town. One was the saddle shop, where I smelled the leather just walking past its open doors, and it raised my spirits. The other was the art supply store, where I salivated over the paints, brushes, and drawing paper. 

 

Cameron's new book is Walking in This World. In it, she adds a third to-do to her list. It is a once-a-week, 20- minute walk.

 

"We walk as we live, a step at a time, and there is something in gently walking that reminds me of how I must live if I am to savor this life that I have been given." –Julia Cameron.

 

 

Well, kiddos, here I am with my head in the clouds again and feel inspired again after spending a day writing another blog post that I discarded.

 

On that post, I was inspired by Brene's Brown, who said, "Vulnerability is not as hard, scary, or dangerous as reaching the end of our lives and asking ourselves, ‘What if I had shown up?’"

 

So, I wondered how to show up. How to tell one's truth—you know truth varies with the one telling it. I began writing about a couple of people who showed up and spoke their truth. However, it was dismal stuff. The stuff the media likes, the stuff that keeps us afraid. Do I want to spend the end of my life there?

 

No.

 

I know people are worried, afraid, and disheartened. I do not mean to minimize their fear. We think Covid is here to stay, darn, but think of it this way, Diphtheria is here to stay too. Polio is here to stay and a pile of other diseases, yet we spend little time worrying about them. This Covid could enter into that realm, cropping up once in a while, unthought-of at other times.

 

I am sorry for all the ills that have happened on our planet. I am sorry we have injured each other. One quote by Dorothy Thompson, the columnist I was writing about, said that the rise of Nazis had nothing to do with class, race, or profession. Nazism, she insisted, had to do with something more innate. "Kind, good, happy, gentlemanly, secure people never go Nazi. But those driven by fear, resentment, insecurity, or self-loathing? They would always fall for fascism.*

 

I know we inherited most of our beliefs from our well-meaning parents, school, society, and who knows what all, probably from our DNA. We have been conditioned. And so, we seek out supporting evidence to support our beliefs. Yep, that is the human condition. 

 

But listen to Anthony De Mello, "Stop Fixing Yourself," Wake up, all is well. 

 

His point?

 

Wake up, Be aware, notice 

 

We are not a problem to be solved. We have not understood this, so we continue to be anxious, insecure, fearful, resentful, unforgiving, and aggressive. In short, we suffer.

 

Yet all around us is divinity within easy grasp. If we discover that divinity, the challenges we struggle to fix will fix themselves.

 

That is grace.

 

The codicil on DeMello's idea is, it requires being aware of what's going on inside us. Awareness wakes us to the truth—which awareness is guaranteed to do. 

 

Joe Dispenza says something similarly taken from a scientific point of view. He says that when we are aware when we notice what we are thinking and rethinking (he says 95% of the thought we think today we thought yesterday), but if we can change our thought patterns from survival to creative, the body heals itself. 

 

Could it be that we have a base of happiness—somewhere deep inside us? I don't know where it is located, but I believe it is there. When we are truly happy, we have a glimpse into that wellspring that lives inside us, but we are afraid it won't last, and we quickly cover it with debris.

 

 

"It's enough for you to be simply watchful and awake," wrote De Mello. Awareness, he said, releases reality to change you. By simply being aware, all that is false and neurotic within you will drop, and your eyes will open to the divinity surrounding you. You will suddenly see that all is well. That you are already happy, and always have been. You are at peace right now and always have been—you just didn't know it.

 

Isn't that what people who have had a near-death experience proclaim?

 

Isn't it fascinating how our minds will reject such thoughts? Yeah, right, that can't be true. That isn't in my experience. What's ya mean, I'm ok? That's BS. I've gone to therapy for 20 years. They have dug deep into my past, childhood, hurts, disappointments, and trauma. Oh yes, trauma is the worst. I've been traumatized. Happy? Snappy. Pfiff.

 

I saw the most beautiful baby at the grocery store yesterday. Her mom was selecting some fruit, and she was sitting in her stroller, smiling at me. Do you remember your babies or someone else's kicking their little feet and giggling? You might say they are innocent and don't know the world's problems or the ills that are out to get us. No, they don't. 

 

They are enjoying being alive.

 

 *What is fascism in simple terms?

Fascism is a system of government led by a dictator who typically rules by forcefully and often violently suppressing opposition and criticism, controlling all industry and commerce, and promoting nationalism and often racism.