Tuesday, October 18, 2022

It's Our Turn

 

What do you do with discouragement?

 

Don't read all those symptoms that something is wrong with you. Don't think you should take this something to calm your nerves or that something heal your ills. (Maybe a pizza. When pizza's were really good, I used to say that I was like Trigger from Winnie the Pooh--he couldn't be unpleased with a balloon. I couldn't be unpleased with a pizza.) Look at it this way: Nothing is wrong with you. You have stinkin' thinking to quote Zig Zigler.

 

Me too. I got discouraged and wondered if my blog had jumped the shark.

 

I didn't know what "Jump the shark" meant until my daughter explained it. It came from "Happy Days," where The Fonze was water skiing and jumped a shark. Since then, it means the show ought to quit. It has overstayed its welcome.

Perhaps I ought to say something meaningful.

 

I have been distracted with my Real Estate studies and let you guys down. I was distracted by what I saw "out there" regarding world conditions and felt helpless to modify, help, or change it. I apologize. 

 

We have a sea of choices, including for you to read this. We have so many options we don't know what to believe. And the headlines distract me from the work I ought to be doing. It's called procrastination, or as Steven Pressfield says in The War of Work, Resistance.

 

So, guys, it's up to us.

 

I listened to Garrison Keeler's tape the other day, where he said God made some mistakes. (Even him, huh?) He should have told Adam and Eve Not to eat the snake.

 

"To change the quality of the day is the highest of the arts," to quote me quoting Henry David Thoreau. I think of that often, for throughout life, we have those moments where we can choose what goes into our brains. Sometimes, I admit the unwanted sneaks in. We're human. So, let's cut ourselves some slack.

 

Think of  it this way to quote another sage, "When we forget how to laugh, we forget how to think." Who said that? I'd tell you if I could remember or find it.

While I love motivational speakers and hold dear wise words from people more learned than me, I know that most people do not have an Instagram life. So all of our pictures aren't rosy, and all of our experiences aren't grand. 

 

We see so many photo-shopped images it's hard to tell the untouched from the touched. Most of us don't have the bodies, faces, skin, or hair of those beautiful people we see presented on media sites. (Don't read fashion magazines, it will just make you feel ugly--unless you are the enlightened soul l think you are and can see behind the makeup,) 

 

When Lucy Hone spoke on Ted Talk about "Resilient People," she asked her audience questions such as, "Have you ever had your heart broken?" "Have you ever been in an accident, had surgery, broken a bone, know someone who had cancer, or watched a loved one die?" Soon the entire audience was standing. 

While some people walk on hot coals to prove they can, almost everyone has walked through the fire of life.

 

Therefore, our mission, should we choose to accept it, is to learn some mastery skills.

 

"And what would you do," the Master said unto the multitude. If God spoke directly to your face and said, 'I COMMAND THAT YOU BE HAPPY IN THE WORLD AS LONG AS YOU LIVE,' What would you do then?" 

 

And the multitude was silent, not a voice, not a sound was heard upon the hillsides, across the valleys where they stood."

–Richard Bach Illusions

 

As we begin to mend ourselves, we will find that, like throwing a stone in a pond, the rings widen until they touch the far shores, and so will our mending spread to include the whole of the earth.

 

Think big.

 

However, notice the little things—how the sun shines, the birdies sing, and the flowers align to the light. (They are smarter than we are.) My little dog does her happy dance when asked if she wants to go for a walk, and my chickens thank me when I bring their favorite treat--raw oatmeal. 

 

Right now, we can be advocates for our own happiness. We have a big thinking brain; we can learn and grow RIGHT NOW.

 

According to Rick Henson, a neuropsychologist, the brain is the hardware. It sees the red, yellow, and green of the traffic light.

 

The Mind processes the information. "Oh, green means to go."

 

We can use our minds to change our brains, for thought patterns leave behind lasting traces. "Neurons that fire together, wire together," says Donald Hebb, a Canadian neuropsychologist, 

 

"Pat, the lizard, feed the mouse and hug the monkey," says Rick Henson.

 

Lizard = the Reptilian Brain, that primitive brain whose purpose is to see that we survive. (Fight, run, freeze. The way much of the world is operating right now.)

 

Mouse = the mammalian brain. It is called the limbic system and is the center of emotion and learning.

 

Monkey = the neocortex, the higher brain.

 

The amygdala in the mammalian (Monkey) brain is the filtering system—the security checkpoint of airports. It scans for threats or danger and then authorizes admittance into the higher brain, the neocortex.

 

The amygdala has no concept of time. Therefore, past, present, and futures are all together, all the same.

 

That explains how traumatized individuals are stuck in the past. For them, their trauma is happening right now. The amygdala was never designed to store long-term.

 

Hanson's instructor told him to go ahead and repeat his bad experiences as long as he wanted. But ten times is enough.

 

Sometimes the amygdala is called the joyful amygdala, which has a beautiful characteristic.

 

IT SEES OPPORTUNITY.

 

Oh, you know how grand it feels to see something as an opportunity instead of a stumbling block. You light up and are rearing to go.

 

We can train your amygdala away from trauma. The more we know ourselves, the more resilient we are.

 

Find an opportunity to be happy. Stay with it. Remember, "Neurons that fire together wire together." (The hardware.)

 

Find an opportunity to be joyful.

 

Be grateful.

 

Hug the Monkey.

 

The monkey yearns for connection. The monkey, aka the mammalian brain, needs social interaction. Hanson says that LOVE is a multivitamin.

 

Humans are good at having experiences. Humans are one animal, along with other primates, that continue to play into adulthood, and with play comes higher learning.

 

People who play often stretch themselves. Toddlers will move the jump farther away from the couch to make it more challenging. Adults put themselves into all sorts of trials to learn new things. They climb higher mountains, they perfect their game, be it an athletic event or an artistic endeavor. All this is under the guise of doing what they want. 

 

Play! 

 

It's our turn.

 


 

 


 

 

 

Monday, October 10, 2022

Sand, Bat, Bed

 

From Harold, my tax attorney for over 30 years: Used with his permission.

 

 

The Old Broken Bat

It was just an old, broken bat, but it was mine

The team didn’t want it, but for me, it was fine.

Dad got it from the school, the handle covered with tape.

For a preschool boy, it was in good, usable shape.

Throw it over my shoulder, and it would almost touch the ground.

Try to swing it as hard as I could, and it would almost go around.

I could use it, and imaginary baseball I would play.

Sometimes, in life, we get broken and useless, so it seems.

But there is always enough love to restore those dreams.

In god’s hands you are not ready to be thrown away

He has a purpose for you, as in His love you stay.

Reach out to those who are worn and broken,

And see that kind words of love are spoken.

Sometimes you feel like that “Old Broken bat,” thrown away.

But remember, you still have great value, in your unique way.

Take the old broken bat in your life and swing it proudly,

Let it speak for you, often and loudly.

“I’m here, and I’m useful and not beyond repair.”

Put on that smile and wear it everywhere!

Harold 09/19/14

 

Walking on Sand

Two old codgers walking on the sand.

Shuffling along, hand in hand.

The song of the gull, the roar of the surf, music to their ears,

Sounds that are still the same after all those years.

Stop and reach down for a stone, a shell or a piece of wood,

“The wind’s getting chilly, dear, better pull up your hood.”

A glance, a smile, a twinkle in the eye.

Silently remembering happy days gone by.

“Getting a little tired? Time to go back to the car?”

Turning around, “Oh my, have we come that far?”

What’s this? Amazing how young they feel.

Start back to the car, a new spring in their heel.

Two old codgers walking on the sand.

No more shuffling, but stepping out, hand in hand.

Harold

05/29/04

 

The Bed

She was moved from the hospital to rehab and assigned a bed.

Her mind was fogged with drugs, and every event was faced with dread.

The pain was apparent with every word she spoke that day.

She begged her husband not to go home but to stay.

“I’ll move over, you can share my bed tonight.”

But he had to go and leave that heartbreaking sight.

He returned the next day to spend as much time as was needed.

Remembering the night before, how for him to stay, she pleaded.

Here is the story of an event during the previous night.

How a frightened, lonely lady handled her plight.

She was found on the floor beside that bed.

Blankets pulled around her, pillow under her head.

What are you doing?” Was the question she heard while uncomfortable and cold.

“I’m going to sleep here, so my husband can have the bed!” they were told.

“He’s coming back and needs a place to sleep,” is what she said.

For the sake of her love, she was willing to give up the bed.

The drugs wore off and the pain left over time.

But I’ll never forget the love of that wonderful wife of mine!

Harold

 2011

 

 


Monday, October 3, 2022

In Case You Missed It:

 Rude but funny.

 


You know what the most significant distraction for anyone who works on the computer is don't you? Of course, the Internet.  Yet it's fun to start the day with a chuckle.

 

From Jay Leno's Late night came this from a 100-year-old woman: 


Leno: "I heard you went to Universal Studios yesterday."

 

"Yes," she said, "the wind was blowing and I was wearing a skirt and holding onto my hat. 

 

"A young man came by," she said. He told her, "Lady, you better hold down your skirt. We can see everything you've got."

 

"Honey," she said, "everything I've got is 100 years old. But this is a new hat."

 


 

Here's a challenge:

 

Read the excerpt from the children's book, The Snail with a Right Heart, and not buy it.

 

I couldn't.


 

https://www.themarginalian.org/the-snail-with-the-right-heart/ 

 


 

 

With fascination, I read the lengthy excerpt of Maria Popoya's book printed in The Marginalian--biology, the origin of life, snail reproduction, and Jeremy, the snail with a shell coiled the opposite direction of most every other snail. And with his its internal organs opposite as well.

 

And then came a "but," and the excerpt ended.

 

What?

 

What happens next?

 

It's going to make me cry, I know it. 

 

The book is in the mail.

 

 

Kirkus Best Book of 2021: A Best Informational Picture Book

 Marginalian (formerly Brain Pickings) Loveliest Children's Book of 2021

 Spirituality & Practice Best Spiritual Book of 2021

 

All of the author's proceeds will go to the Children's Heart Foundation, whose quarter-century devotion to funding research and scientific collaborations is shedding light on congenital heart conditions to help young humans with unusual hearts live longer, wider lives.

 

 

And on the home front--a friend who is cruising into a broken heart.


 

Take a lesson--don't get scammed by a promise of romance with sweet talk and I love you's from a chat room.

 

My husband says romance/money scams are a billion dollar business. And schools to teach the scammers how to prey on hopeful hearts.

 

Here's her story: He is (supposedly) off-shore on an oil drilling rig, and has mortgaged his home to invest in some scheme that will make him 9 million dollars, so he can retire in style.

 

He says he has a Scottish accent and immigrated to America with his father when he was 20. Our friend and he are only texting, no speaking, but have exchanged pictures.

 

He says he is off the shore of Louisiana, which would be in a 3-hour time zone from where she lives, yet their visits are 12 hours apart. Hum. What's wrong with this picture? Many things actually.

 

She's in love with him and thinks they're engaged. Yesterday he sent word was that there was an explosion on board the rig and financial loss. [Plus an Emoji sad face.]

 

The plot thickens.

 

The heart is a lonely hunter, someone said, and wrote a book by that title. Luckily, he's across the globe, and she's here, and she is holding onto her money with an iron fist.

 She could read a novel, but this is more fun.


  

“No man* knows how much he is an optimist, even when he calls himself a pessimist, because he has not really measured the depths of his debt to whatever created him and enabled him to call himself anything. At the back of our brains… [there is] a forgotten blaze or burst of astonishment at our own existence.”G.K. Chesterton